Grocery Store Logistics Hell

Okay, I was pretty pumped today that Darron's boss is letting me use his driver once a week to go to the grocery store. Not only will be park up close and wait for me, he'll help carry all the groceries to the elevator! Half of that was correct. He did NOT park close. I'll try and explain in US mall terms. The grocery store is in a large mall. We'll call the grocery store Sears. He parked at JC Penny's (not close). I tried to explain to him that he needed to park closer to the hypermarket in order for me to get my grocery cart back to him. He doesn't speak a lick of English. So he parks at "JC Penny's" in the parking garage. I think "okay, maybe he knows that I can push my "Sears"cart all the way through the mall to get back to him". PRAISE the LORD I remembered what color and number he parked near. I shop for 1.5 hours. I go to leave and the guard won't let me past the store with my cart full of grocery's. I decide to exit by the store and go right into the parking garage (where he should have parked). I do that and find an elevator. It's my lucky day! I pick up one end of the cart since in order to get to the elevator I have to get the cart over a concrete square curb. Why God Why? I can deal with this. I can take it one level down and find my driver. Elevator is broke. Have to get it back over the square concrete curb. I find a security guard and say "mashina" (car) and point one level down. He points to the elevator. I show him it's broken and he motions for me to take the cart to the other side of the garage and down the ramp. YAY. Not so much. I take the cart down the ramp and to my horror the door is shut and locked. I have to pull my cart back up the ramp myself. (For a nice visual, lets remember I have a weeks worth of groceries including 3 TEN lb. bottled waters). I find another security guard who turns out to be my grocery store hero. He points to another ramp and we go and find it's also locked. In the midst of this, one of the wheels gets bent so it doesn't roll like it should. Hero security guard then decides we are going to carry the cart down two flights of stairs. Lovely. We carry the cart and wind our way through the parking garage until we find my driver. All my frozen goodies were completely thawed. After I got home (and the driver did bring everything up!) I just had to laugh at the absurdity of it!

Next time I'm definitely taking a map!